“Scapegoat” written by Devin Gackle, March 2018

The definition of scapegoat is: “A person who is blamed for the wrongdoings, mistakes, or faults of others,” someone who is blamed for other people’s thoughts or actions, or my personal favorite, “one that is the object of irrational hostility.”

Raise your hand if you’ve ever been scapegoated. Yeah, it sucks.

I’ve been scapegoated, more than once, by people I trusted and cared for; people who decided it would be easier to project all their crap onto me, blaming me for all their problems and insecurities rather than actually deal with them, and cut all ties with me in order to get rid of said crap. (Except, that’s not how it works; your problems still exist, bro.)

It used to be that it just made me sad. I blamed myself, thought I wasn’t good enough - and therefore lost most of my confidence, self-esteem, and sense of self-worth. It took me a while to see the truth, and eventually, I found a word for these situations: scapegoat.

It only made sense to write a song about how it feels to be scapegoated; but I wrote this song from a perspective that’s slightly angered and superior. I wrote it this way to convey that while it really hurts to be scapegoated, the hurt can be overcome when you realize it’s not about you at all. And even though it’s hard not to want to vindicate yourself with that person, there’s not really a point in it when they’re determined to cast you off.

In a nutshell, this song is my way of saying I’m done with it.

Lyrics:

I was there to witness your fall from grace

You had a lot to say when you threw forgiveness in my face

I had to break down before I could climb out of the well

It took some time to understand I don’t have to vindicate myself

The problem is I wasn’t your problem, I was just your scapegoat

Now you can’t ignore them or let it go

So don’t project your lies onto me

I was there for you to toss the blame

You just made me your convenient cast away

You have some nerve claiming to be the victim

I’m not the reason for your insecurities, let me tell you where to stick ‘em

The problem is I wasn’t your problem, I was just your scapegoat

Now you can’t ignore them or let it go

So don’t project your lies onto me

They aren’t there, those thoughts you put in my head

You put words in my mouth I never said

Never thought to say

I’m not your problem, no I’m not your problem

The problem is I wasn’t your problem, I was just your scapegoat

Now you can’t ignore them or let it go

So don’t project your lies

Don’t project your lies onto me